I told this story at the Tenx9 Nashville Storytelling event last week – Theme: Courage.
Enjoy! 😀

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It was 3am. Not a sound in the house. But suddenly everyone awoke with a small shriek, sitting straight up in their sleeping bags, half asleep, hearts pounding.
Then we realized the loud, creepy, frantic laughter of a man’s voice was coming out of the Tickle Me Cookie Monster doll my friend had unknowingly rolled over on. 
Of course we all died laughing and went back to sleep.

It was my birthday…my sweet sixteen slumber party… The doll was a gag gift from one of my friends that year, but that was the first – of the two – traumatic experiences from that party.

Colorado is beautiful in the fall, and that next afternoon was perfect weather for being outside. We jumped on the backyard trampoline, playing Simon-Says-type “add-on” games, and double-bouncing each other until we got tired and just sat in the middle, talking about boys and school, and whose hair was the prettiest and how we loved each other’s fingernails… and so on.
But then we heard something weird.
It wasn’t dramatic. My friend just said, “Did you hear that?” and we all got quiet. She said she heard some kind of rustling under the deck, about 7 or 8 yards from us. It was dark and shadowy under there, the way it sloped down the little hill our house was on, and we couldn’t see anything from where we were sitting.
We didn’t hear it, so we passed it off as a squirrel or something. My friend insisted that it sounded much larger than a squirrel. We shrugged and kept talking.
A few minutes later, we all heard another sound, and it was definitely the shifting of something much larger than a squirrel.

We froze.

You’ve gotta understand that we lived in a cabin in the middle of the woods, on private property that used to be a camp, and we regularly saw giant raccoons and various wildlife, and this included the occasional bear. Raccoons usually came out at night, sneaking around the trash, but bears… kinda do what they want, whenever they want, right?

We have a picture of a bear – in the middle of the afternoon, leaning up against that trampoline – arms resting on the metal bars as if he was thinking of claiming this activity for his next birthday party. But thankfully that was a few years before mine.
But I realized that bears had come to this very spot before, and so I wasn’t ruling out the possibility that one might be underneath that deck.

I called out to my mom hoping she was right inside the door, but she must have been downstairs on the other side of the house, because nobody came at this point. My sister was inside, but there was no sign of her, either.

We had only heard these two noises, followed by several minutes of silence as we all whispered trying to guess what it was, and what we would do.
We started thinking maybe we were just being silly… I mean, the noises had stopped, so maybe we were being hyper-dramatic over nothing.
Then we heard a shuffle and a low, quiet, halfhearted growl.
We shrieked and moved in closer to hug each other. I immediately started yelling for my mom and sister, over and over.
Eventually my sister opened the door and I said, “Get Mom! There’s a bear under the deck!” Color drained from her face and she frantically turned around and ran inside.

8 yards of ground between us and the steps to get back up the deck and back to the door to the safety of the house.

The courage came from my friend Jennifer, who was plotting what she would do to protect us all. The plan was this: She would run to the steps, grab the broom beside the door, and…
…I don’t know, beat him to death with a broom?
I don’t really remember what her plan was. I just remember that she was the hero in all of our eyes.
My mom rushed outside and asked us if we were sure it was a bear.
“Yes! It growled! …It’s bigger than a dog…”

My friends were talking about seeing a shadow at this point. “It moved! It’s a huge shadow!” And we all screamed.
My mom said she was going to call 911 for animal control and yelled for my sister to call my dad.
She said he probably won’t bother us if we don’t bother him, and she asked if we had food with us. I said no, and she seemed relieved and tried to comfort us.
Then she went inside and disappeared with the telephone.

Meanwhile, our eyes stayed glued to the shadowy figure.  It didn’t move and it didn’t make any sound.  Jennifer kept talking about her broom idea and said if it moved one more time she was gonna make her move.  Several minutes went by and we saw no sign of my mom or sister, except for the occasional glance out the window as they held the phone to their ears.

Suddenly there was another passive growl and shuffle, and Jennifer said, “I’m going!” and we watched in fear as she bolted off the trampoline, ran up the stairs and grabbed the broom.
I still have this image of her on the deck, pivoting, arms raised, knees bent, like Granny Clampett defending her property.

We expected the bear to tear out of the gate at this point and gobble us up, and so I suddenly became brave.
My bravery was a little different than Jennifer’s, though.
I screamed as I ran up the stairs, passed Jennifer in all her glory, and ran inside, leaving my friends on the trampoline to die.

I’d like to think I was just being smart, that I could do more good inside, trying to get answers and relay some hope to the people outside…  :-/

As I talked with my mom and sister about what was being done, when dad would be home, and if animal control was coming, I looked around for anything that would offer more protection for everyone than just a broom.
As I got closer to the door, I looked out the window and noticed the demeanor of the girls on the trampoline had changed.
They were now huddled in a circle, holding hands, praying and crying together.
The whole ordeal had gone on for at least 20 or 30 minutes already, and we were all at a loss for what to do now but wait.

Then my mom started acting weird and giving strange answers for questions I was asking, and my sister was shrugging her shoulders and looking at my mom like something was wrong.
“What’s going on??” I asked.
My mom was pacing, mentioning something about this having gone on too long, and I was like, “I know! Is animal control coming??”

Then my dad jumped out from under the deck.

My dad who is slightly smaller than the size of a large bear.  My dad who sounds like a bear moving around in crisp leaves.  My dad with the deep voice and apparently amazing talent to growl like a bear, and who thinks these kinds of jokes are hilarious.

This is not the only practical joke he has played over the years, but I believe that was the first big one.

I did learn something about courage that day. I learned that my friend Jennifer had the most impressive heart and courage of all. 
 And I learned that I’m incredibly selfish – or, ok, a bit brave.
And I learned my dad is evil. ;-D
The end.

Three days into the “Release the Light” Kickstarter Campaign, and you guys have already raised over 30% of the goal! Thank you so much! If you haven’t yet seen all the hype yet, check out my Kickstarter video and all the creative prizes here! ⤵

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I was 26 years old, and I hadn’t planned on needing to defend myself that day. I’ve never desired to use a gun in my life.

My dad is hunter and had taught my sister, step-brother, and me how to shoot rifles once or twice when we were kids. I wasn’t good at it, but I liked hanging out in the woods with my dad.
This particular day, however, both my parents were out of state, and my grown-up self was manning their house in Colorado for a week. Let’s NOT say I had moved back home to live with my parents – Let’s say I had been visiting them for an elongated summer while I worked hard on my music career…

That being said, I had on a cute outfit for a concert that night, and I was practicing guitar in the backyard. (I like to practice outside at my parents’ house, because the weather is always perfect in the summertime, beside afternoon showers, and it’s always quiet and secluded, being private property.)

As I was playing, I heard the phone ringing from inside the house. I had to run around to the front door, and by the time I did that, shut the screen door behind me, put my guitar down and ran to the kitchen to pick up the phone, I had missed the call. I knew it was my mom calling to tell me they’d made it ok. I dialed the number back and waited for her to pick up, but suddenly I heard a very different noise coming from around the corner – from the front door.
It was as if someone thought they could walk right in but realized the screen door had locked, and the faint rattle of the door turned into subtle scratching noises like someone trying to pick a lock or see how sturdy the door wasn’tso they could continue.

I dropped the phone in panic and froze against the wall. With my parents gone, none of my friends around… this being private property with only anti-social neighbors… there was no reason anyone should have been trying to get in the front door.

I figured they’d probably seen me outside and gathered that I was alone… The last thing I wanted was to be a victim of whatever they had planned, so I immediately ran to my parents’ bedroom where I had remembered my dad saying he kept a handgun. 
Thankfully it was in the same place he said it would be. 
I grabbed the gun, surprised out how cold, but especially how heavy it was for such a small gun. Naturally prepared, my dad had it preloaded. I cocked the hammer back, and I probably looked like a scared Charlie’s Angel as I crept around the corner, holding the gun just like a movie.

I could still hear the noises, but they kept getting louder, like someone had taken out a knife and was now impatiently cutting through the screen webbing.
I thought back to horror movies I had seen.
My heart pounded as I turned the corner… To my utter surprise… but not at all to my relief…
It was a bear. Literally clawing through our screen door.

Earlier that day, I had been indulging in my obsessive compulsive amusements, helping my parents out by processing the bad parts off their fruits and vegetables – putting the good parts in plastic bags and Tupperware, neatly in the refrigerator… and the stinky bad parts, in a nice salad bowl for bears, otherwise known as our trashcan.

No one really uses air conditioning in the mountains of Colorado – you just open all the windows and doors and keep the screen door shut to let in the breeze – but apparently that breeze goes both ways, and this particular guy liked what was being advertised from our home.

So the bear had clawed all the way through the screen door at this point, leaving a huge square hole, and his head and arms were through the door and in our house, as if he were going to somersault into our home at any moment.

I forgot all about how you’re supposed to make a lot of noise when you see a bear. I didn’t want to aggravate him, so I stayed completely silent -just pointing the gun straight at him, walking toward him, questioning whether or not I could actually shoot a living thing if I had to.

He looked up, startled…wiggled his chubby self out of the middle of the door and surprisingly backed away. 
I quickly ran forward, closed the main door and called my dad to freak out over the phone.

He calmed me down… said it was good I didn’t shoot the bear, as I would have gone to jail according to Colorado law. He said to wait a few minutes… and then to go outside and put bleach around the doors and windows, because apparently bears hate this.

(Naturally, my first response was: “mm…you would like me to go outside right now—where a bear is walking around—and mop the edges of our house and come back?”)
He said the bear would have probably walked off into the woods by now and that it was important that I do this soon, so that he didn’t come right back. (Naturally my 2nd response was: “umm…he might come back really soon and you would like me to go outside right now and mop the edges of our house and come back?”)
He thought it’d be ok.

I mustered up the courage, grabbed one of those noisemaker hand clappers – (yes, it was nearby because my mom makes me take that with me every time I go hiking behind the property) – and I don’t care what Colorado law is, I took the gun – along with my bleach, and made my way around each window, working fast.
When I came around the back of the house to the front, I saw my new friend again —in our driveway— and I sprinted toward the door. The little guy must have been pretty wussy, because he got frightened again too, and he shimmied up the glorified Charlie Brown pine tree by our driveway, got up to the top and sat there looking at me, looking out at him.

Then the funniest thing happened. He was too big for the tree, and just like a cartoon, as he held on for dear life, the tree bent over sideways and dropped him off in rejection. He lumbered off to the woods. I put the 45 automatic back – hopefully for good – then I gathered my belongings, raced off to the show that evening, and that was one time where it was very appropriate to get up on stage and say, “Thank you, it is so good to be here tonight!”

I have a group of friends from church who regularly meet each week, and I’m grateful for Dylan passing this along to everyone yesterday.  Not sure if it’s been circulating and I’m just now seeing it, but I feel like it’s always fitting.

GOD’S LOVE LETTER

You may not know me, but I know everything about you… Psalm 139:1

I know when you sit down and when you rise up… Psalm 139:2

I am familiar with all your ways… Psalm 139:3

Even the very hairs on your head are numbered… Matthew 10:29-31

For you were made in my image… Genesis 1:27

In me you live and move and have your being… Acts 17:28

For you are my offspring…. Acts 17:28

I knew you even before you were conceived… Jeremiah 1:4-5

I chose you when I planned creation… Ephesians 1: 11-12

You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book… Psalm 139:15-16

I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live… Acts 17:26

You are fearfully and wonderfully made… Psalm 139:14

I knit you together in your mother’s womb… Psalm 139:13

And brought you forth on the day you were born… Psalm 71:6

I have been misrepresented by those who don’t know me… John 8:41-44

I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love… I John 4:16

And it is my desire to lavish my love on you simply because you are my child and I am your father… 1 John3:1

I offer you more than your earthly parents ever could… Matthew 7:11

For I am the perfect father/mother… Matthew 5:48

Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand… James 1:17

For I am your provider and I meet all your needs… Matthew 6:31-33

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope… Jeremiah 29:11

Because I love you with an everlasting love… Jeremiah 31:3

My thoughts towards you are countless as the sand on the seashore… Psalm 139:17-18

And I rejoice over you with singing… Zephaniah 3:17

I will never stop doing good to you… Jeremiah 32:40

For you are my treasured possession… Exodus 19:5

I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul… Jeremiah 32:41

And I want to show you great and marvelous things… Jeremiah 33:3

If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me… Deuteronomy 4:29

Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart… Psalm 37:4

For it is I who gave you those desires… Philippians 2:13

I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine… Ephesians 3:20

For I am your greatest encourager… 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

I am also the Father/Mother who comforts you in all your troubles… 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you… Psalm 34:18

As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close you my heart… Isaiah 40:11

One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes and will take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth…. Revelation 21:3-4

I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus… John 17:23

For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed… John 17:26

He is the exact representation of my being… Hebrews 1:3

He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you… Romans 8:31

And to tell you that I am not counting your sins… 2 Corinthians 5:18-19

Jesus died so that I could be reconciled… 2 Corinthians 5:18-19

His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you… I John 4:10

I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love… Romans 8:38-39

Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen… Luke 15:7

I have always been your Parent, and will always be your Parent… Ephesians 3:14-15

Will you accept yourself as My child? John 1:12-13

I am waiting for you … Luke 15:11-32

My friend Jon had asked who inspired the song choices for this new CD.  I wrote him back a novel and a half, and then I figured, why waste a perfectly good novel?  Those of you who (are awesome and therefore) have the CD might be curious to know as well.

The entire musical theme was inspired by Allison Ogren and Robert Robinson’s lullaby Christmas album:  “Tis the Season: Kid’s Christmas” – which is a staple CD for me (I listen to it year-round, anytime I’m stressed or want to relax)

If you read the thanks section, you see where I got a lot of the inspirations… like wanting to record “Come Thou Fount” because of Ashley Cleveland (and mostly because of how she told the story behind the song in one of her concerts. I never knew the story before. However, she didn’t add that “he came back to the Lord” … because that is speculation and sort of an added end to the story that has circulated.  l found it fascinating, that he was the writer of that and struggled so much to the point that he may never have come back to belief in the Lord.  Makes my heart leap out to him even more, I guess).

Be Thou My Vision was inspired by Ginny Owens’ angelic acapella version, which is why I love the song in general.

Great Is Thy…has always been my favorite slow hymn.

How Deep the Father’s Love For Us is my new favorite hymn of all time, even though it was written in 1995 as a modern one. It sounds ancient. The song having made the CD is thanks to Jay Rockholt for playing it as a special in church one Sunday (Jay sings backup on a couple of the songs on the CD and also plays guitar for me on How Deep..)  I had never heard the song before that Sunday.

Fairest Lord Jesus – the guitar instrumental – was pieced together from 2 separate youtube videos, spliced together by yours truly, transcribed note-for-note by a few of us and given to Dave Issacs, who can read sheet music.  😉  I just couldn’t find any arrangement I liked and decided to just research my own.  If you’re curious, these were the original videos I found:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEu8KI3JRkI  and  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thW26H6Y7xA&feature=related  < starting at the 1:26 mark.

Likewise, my mom’s song – the piano medley – was because of a truly talented pianist on youtube who comes up with beautiful arrangements to hymns… (Ross Kettles)  I originally heard an arrangement of this other song (that you will recognize)  😉  while searching through random youtube videos for piano arrangements… http://www.youtube.com/user/s0233425#p/u/16/-p6U5SVdn2g

I actually asked him if he would write a song for me that included two of my mom’s favorites (“I Need Thee Every Hour” and “I’d Rather Have Jesus”) and this was the work-in-progress rough idea:  http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/7316/medleyfinal.mp4

Again, transcribed note-for-note, (then I shortened it for time’s sake) and my mom played it!

I just noticed that he’s re-recorded the original version with his own polished unique additions and changes – very cool:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_SA6LsSeSBI

In the Garden – I added because it’s Pastor Cassada’s favorite and I believe my dad’s favorite and others who go to Verity. Since the CD exists because of Verity Baptist asking me over and over to come out with a CD of all hymns 🙂  I put In The Garden on there for them.  It wasn’t one of my favorites before, but because of Verity and due to Blair Masters’ beautiful arrangement and Rhodes piano sound, it’s now one of my favorites on the CD.

I first heard Mercy Me’s version of The Love of God in some random CD compilation I believe I got free from the radio station throwaway box.  Again, I’d never heard the song before.  This is their simple, straight-ahead version  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34auuAoNgOU  Then I heard the story behind the song–that the words to the 3rd verse were found scribbled on the wall of an insane asylum cell–and it made me even happier I added it.  I suppose that is a bit Tim Burtonish…what can I say.

Pass Me Not was inspired by a group called Kairos who recorded a slightly-faster, more bluegrass version on their CD. They’re a group made up of people I used to go to college with, including Andrew Greer and Pamela Kelly-McLellan.  Again, I never even liked the song that much until their version made it one of my favorites.

Random thought about Tis So Sweet… I like the chords that appear halfway and throughout the rest of the song–Billy’s hook–because the three-note-walkup reminds me of the song “Iris” by the GooGoo Dolls, which I’ve always liked.

Finally, O The Deep Deep Love…was inspired by a CD of songs from various artists here in Nashville- “Indellible Grace” collection of old hymns that are modernized -and Katy Bowser sang this song on the CD.  Her voice sometimes sounds like a wicked witch singing that God loves me.  Kind of creepy, but I love the song. haha  It’s supposed to have that edge to her voice that makes her so unique, so I’m not trying to be mean, I actually like her singing it.

The End. End of novel.